{"id":20,"date":"2026-06-16T17:39:31","date_gmt":"2026-06-16T17:39:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/what-the-phuck.com\/?page_id=20"},"modified":"2026-06-16T19:25:36","modified_gmt":"2026-06-16T19:25:36","slug":"home","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/what-the-phuck.com\/","title":{"rendered":"Home"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t<div data-elementor-type=\"wp-page\" data-elementor-id=\"20\" class=\"elementor elementor-20\" data-elementor-post-type=\"page\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-2d24804 e-con-full e-flex e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"2d24804\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-80a039d elementor-widget elementor-widget-html\" data-id=\"80a039d\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"html.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<!-- WHAT THE PHUCK HOMEPAGE \u2014 CONTENT ONLY (NO HEADER \/ NO FOOTER) -->\r\n<style>\r\n.wtp-home,\r\n.wtp-home *{box-sizing:border-box}\r\n.wtp-home{\r\n  --yellow:#ffd522;\r\n  --red:#f01818;\r\n  --blue:#168dda;\r\n  --green:#31b54a;\r\n  --pink:#f03e91;\r\n  --black:#111;\r\n  --cream:#fff8e6;\r\n  --white:#fff;\r\n  width:100%;\r\n  overflow:hidden;\r\n  color:var(--black);\r\n  background:#fffdf7;\r\n  font-family:Poppins,Arial,sans-serif;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-home img{display:block;max-width:100%;height:auto}\r\n.wtp-home a{text-decoration:none}\r\n.wtp-shell{width:min(1380px,94%);margin:0 auto}\r\n.wtp-comic-title{\r\n  margin:0;\r\n  font-family:Bangers,\"Arial Black\",sans-serif;\r\n  text-transform:uppercase;\r\n  letter-spacing:.6px;\r\n  line-height:.95;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-btn{\r\n  display:inline-flex;\r\n  align-items:center;\r\n  justify-content:center;\r\n  min-height:52px;\r\n  padding:12px 24px;\r\n  border:4px solid var(--black);\r\n  box-shadow:6px 6px 0 var(--black);\r\n  font-family:Bangers,\"Arial Black\",sans-serif;\r\n  font-size:21px;\r\n  letter-spacing:.7px;\r\n  text-transform:uppercase;\r\n  transition:.15s ease;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-btn:hover{transform:translate(-3px,-3px);box-shadow:9px 9px 0 var(--black)}\r\n.wtp-btn-red{background:var(--red);color:#fff}\r\n.wtp-btn-blue{background:var(--blue);color:#fff}\r\n.wtp-btn-yellow{background:var(--yellow);color:var(--black)}\r\n.wtp-btn-green{background:var(--green);color:#fff}\r\n.wtp-btn-pink{background:var(--pink);color:#fff}\r\n\r\n\/* HERO *\/\r\n.wtp-hero{\r\n  position:relative;\r\n  min-height:620px;\r\n  border-bottom:5px solid var(--black);\r\n  background:\r\n    radial-gradient(rgba(240,24,24,.28) 2px,transparent 2px),\r\n    linear-gradient(115deg,#ffd522 0%,#ffca14 56%,#ffda32 100%);\r\n  background-size:16px 16px,auto;\r\n  overflow:hidden;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-hero:before{\r\n  content:\"\";\r\n  position:absolute;\r\n  inset:-80px -40px auto auto;\r\n  width:560px;height:560px;\r\n  border-radius:50%;\r\n  background:radial-gradient(circle,rgba(255,255,255,.5) 0 2px,transparent 3px);\r\n  background-size:18px 18px;\r\n  transform:rotate(12deg);\r\n  opacity:.5;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-hero-inner{\r\n  position:relative;\r\n  z-index:2;\r\n  width:min(1380px,94%);\r\n  margin:0 auto;\r\n  min-height:620px;\r\n  display:grid;\r\n  grid-template-columns:1.02fr .98fr;\r\n  align-items:center;\r\n  gap:36px;\r\n  padding:55px 0 44px;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-hero-copy{position:relative;z-index:3}\r\n.wtp-hero-kicker{\r\n  display:inline-block;\r\n  margin-bottom:12px;\r\n  padding:6px 14px;\r\n  background:var(--black);\r\n  color:#fff;\r\n  border:3px solid var(--black);\r\n  transform:rotate(-2deg);\r\n  font-family:Bangers,\"Arial Black\",sans-serif;\r\n  font-size:20px;\r\n  text-transform:uppercase;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-hero-title{\r\n  font-size:clamp(72px,8vw,132px);\r\n  color:#fff;\r\n  -webkit-text-stroke:5px var(--black);\r\n  text-shadow:10px 10px 0 var(--red),14px 14px 0 var(--black);\r\n  transform:rotate(-2deg);\r\n}\r\n.wtp-hero-tagline{\r\n  display:inline-block;\r\n  margin:24px 0 16px;\r\n  padding:10px 16px;\r\n  background:var(--black);\r\n  color:#fff;\r\n  font-family:Bangers,\"Arial Black\",sans-serif;\r\n  font-size:clamp(22px,2.5vw,34px);\r\n  line-height:1.05;\r\n  text-transform:uppercase;\r\n  transform:rotate(-1deg);\r\n}\r\n.wtp-hero-tagline span{color:var(--yellow)}\r\n.wtp-hero-copy p{\r\n  max-width:650px;\r\n  margin:0 0 24px;\r\n  font-size:18px;\r\n  font-weight:700;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-hero-buttons{display:flex;gap:18px;flex-wrap:wrap}\r\n.wtp-hero-art{\r\n  position:relative;\r\n  min-height:500px;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-hero-art .main{\r\n  position:absolute;\r\n  left:22%;\r\n  bottom:4%;\r\n  width:46%;\r\n  z-index:4;\r\n  filter:drop-shadow(10px 12px 0 rgba(17,17,17,.18));\r\n}\r\n.wtp-hero-art .goose{\r\n  position:absolute;\r\n  right:1%;\r\n  top:5%;\r\n  width:35%;\r\n  z-index:3;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-hero-art .tank{\r\n  position:absolute;\r\n  right:2%;\r\n  bottom:7%;\r\n  width:43%;\r\n  z-index:5;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-hero-art .cat{\r\n  position:absolute;\r\n  left:0;\r\n  bottom:2%;\r\n  width:36%;\r\n  z-index:5;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-burst{\r\n  position:absolute;\r\n  padding:12px 22px;\r\n  border:4px solid var(--black);\r\n  color:#fff;\r\n  font-family:Bangers,\"Arial Black\",sans-serif;\r\n  font-size:34px;\r\n  text-transform:uppercase;\r\n  text-shadow:3px 3px 0 var(--black);\r\n  clip-path:polygon(0 35%,18% 30%,10% 8%,34% 21%,46% 0,58% 20%,84% 9%,80% 31%,100% 42%,83% 56%,94% 83%,68% 75%,56% 100%,43% 79%,17% 93%,22% 66%,0 58%);\r\n  z-index:7;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-burst.blue{right:17%;top:10%;background:var(--blue);transform:rotate(-4deg)}\r\n.wtp-burst.red{right:0;bottom:14%;background:var(--red);transform:rotate(5deg)}\r\n\r\n\/* CATEGORIES *\/\r\n.wtp-categories{padding:20px 0 48px;background:#fffdf7}\r\n.wtp-cat-grid{\r\n  display:grid;\r\n  grid-template-columns:repeat(5,1fr);\r\n  gap:14px;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-cat{\r\n  border:4px solid var(--black);\r\n  background:#fff;\r\n  box-shadow:4px 4px 0 rgba(17,17,17,.12);\r\n  overflow:hidden;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-cat-visual{\r\n  position:relative;\r\n  min-height:285px;\r\n  display:flex;\r\n  align-items:flex-end;\r\n  justify-content:center;\r\n  overflow:hidden;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-cat:nth-child(1) .wtp-cat-visual{background:linear-gradient(135deg,#ff8a00,#ffd522)}\r\n.wtp-cat:nth-child(2) .wtp-cat-visual{background:linear-gradient(135deg,#158ee6,#5cc8ff)}\r\n.wtp-cat:nth-child(3) .wtp-cat-visual{background:linear-gradient(135deg,#ef1d1d,#ff6a4c)}\r\n.wtp-cat:nth-child(4) .wtp-cat-visual{background:linear-gradient(135deg,#21a343,#7ee175)}\r\n.wtp-cat:nth-child(5) .wtp-cat-visual{background:linear-gradient(135deg,#e62c8e,#ff83c7)}\r\n.wtp-cat-title{\r\n  position:absolute;\r\n  top:16px;\r\n  left:50%;\r\n  width:90%;\r\n  transform:translateX(-50%) rotate(-3deg);\r\n  color:#fff;\r\n  font-size:38px;\r\n  text-align:center;\r\n  -webkit-text-stroke:2px var(--black);\r\n  text-shadow:4px 4px 0 var(--black);\r\n  z-index:2;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-cat-visual img{max-height:230px;object-fit:contain;position:relative;z-index:1}\r\n.wtp-cat-body{padding:15px 14px 16px;text-align:center}\r\n.wtp-cat-body p{min-height:44px;margin:0 0 14px;font-size:12px;font-weight:800;text-transform:uppercase}\r\n\r\n\/* SECTION TITLES *\/\r\n.wtp-section{padding:42px 0}\r\n.wtp-section-head{\r\n  display:flex;\r\n  justify-content:space-between;\r\n  align-items:center;\r\n  gap:18px;\r\n  margin-bottom:22px;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-section-title{\r\n  font-size:48px;\r\n  color:#111;\r\n  text-shadow:3px 3px 0 #fff;\r\n  transform:rotate(-1deg);\r\n}\r\n.wtp-view-all{\r\n  display:inline-block;\r\n  padding:8px 18px;\r\n  background:#111;\r\n  color:#fff;\r\n  border:3px solid #111;\r\n  box-shadow:4px 4px 0 var(--yellow);\r\n  font-family:Bangers,\"Arial Black\",sans-serif;\r\n  font-size:18px;\r\n  text-transform:uppercase;\r\n}\r\n\r\n\/* PRODUCT GRID *\/\r\n.wtp-product-grid{display:grid;grid-template-columns:repeat(6,1fr);gap:12px}\r\n.wtp-product-card{\r\n  position:relative;\r\n  border:3px solid var(--black);\r\n  background:#fff;\r\n  padding:10px;\r\n  text-align:center;\r\n  min-width:0;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-product-badge{\r\n  position:absolute;\r\n  top:7px;left:5px;\r\n  z-index:3;\r\n  max-width:95px;\r\n  padding:7px 8px;\r\n  background:var(--red);\r\n  color:#fff;\r\n  border:3px solid var(--black);\r\n  font-family:Bangers,\"Arial Black\",sans-serif;\r\n  font-size:17px;\r\n  line-height:.95;\r\n  text-transform:uppercase;\r\n  transform:rotate(-9deg);\r\n}\r\n.wtp-product-image{\r\n  aspect-ratio:1\/1;\r\n  display:flex;\r\n  align-items:center;\r\n  justify-content:center;\r\n  overflow:hidden;\r\n  background:\r\n    radial-gradient(#ddd 1px,transparent 1px),\r\n    #fff;\r\n  background-size:10px 10px;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-product-image img{width:100%;height:100%;object-fit:contain}\r\n.wtp-product-name{margin:10px 0 2px;font-family:Bangers,\"Arial Black\",sans-serif;font-size:20px;text-transform:uppercase}\r\n.wtp-product-price{font-weight:900;font-size:18px;margin-bottom:9px}\r\n.wtp-product-card .wtp-btn{width:100%;min-height:42px;padding:8px 8px;font-size:17px;box-shadow:4px 4px 0 #111}\r\n\r\n\/* BENEFITS *\/\r\n.wtp-benefits{\r\n  border-top:4px solid var(--black);\r\n  border-bottom:4px solid var(--black);\r\n  background:#fff;\r\n  padding:18px 0;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-benefit-grid{display:grid;grid-template-columns:repeat(4,1fr);gap:20px}\r\n.wtp-benefit{display:flex;align-items:center;gap:14px}\r\n.wtp-benefit-icon{font-size:44px}\r\n.wtp-benefit strong{display:block;font-family:Bangers,\"Arial Black\",sans-serif;font-size:20px;text-transform:uppercase}\r\n.wtp-benefit span{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;text-transform:uppercase}\r\n\r\n\/* ABOUT BAND *\/\r\n.wtp-about-band{\r\n  position:relative;\r\n  background:\r\n    radial-gradient(rgba(255,255,255,.25) 1.5px,transparent 1.5px),\r\n    var(--blue);\r\n  background-size:13px 13px;\r\n  border-bottom:4px solid var(--black);\r\n  overflow:hidden;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-about-inner{\r\n  min-height:345px;\r\n  display:grid;\r\n  grid-template-columns:.8fr 1.2fr;\r\n  align-items:center;\r\n  gap:30px;\r\n  padding:40px 0;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-about-copy{color:#fff}\r\n.wtp-about-copy h2{font-size:52px;text-shadow:4px 4px 0 #111}\r\n.wtp-about-copy h2 span{color:var(--yellow)}\r\n.wtp-about-copy p{max-width:560px;font-size:16px;font-weight:700;line-height:1.55}\r\n.wtp-about-art{position:relative;min-height:280px}\r\n.wtp-about-art img{position:absolute;bottom:0;object-fit:contain}\r\n.wtp-about-art .cat{left:0;width:33%}\r\n.wtp-about-art .muscle{left:25%;width:34%;z-index:2}\r\n.wtp-about-art .carrot{left:52%;width:26%;z-index:3}\r\n.wtp-about-art .tank{right:0;width:35%}\r\n\r\n\/* FAVOURITES *\/\r\n.wtp-favourites{padding:35px 0 50px;background:#fffdf7}\r\n.wtp-fav-grid{display:grid;grid-template-columns:repeat(6,1fr);gap:14px}\r\n.wtp-fav{\r\n  border:3px solid var(--black);\r\n  background:#fff;\r\n  padding:8px;\r\n  text-align:center;\r\n}\r\n.wtp-fav img{aspect-ratio:1\/1;width:100%;object-fit:contain}\r\n.wtp-stars{color:#ffc400;font-size:15px;letter-spacing:1px}\r\n.wtp-rating{font-size:11px;font-weight:800;color:#111}\r\n\r\n\/* RESPONSIVE *\/\r\n@media(max-width:1180px){\r\n  .wtp-cat-grid{grid-template-columns:repeat(3,1fr)}\r\n  .wtp-product-grid,.wtp-fav-grid{grid-template-columns:repeat(3,1fr)}\r\n}\r\n@media(max-width:900px){\r\n  .wtp-hero-inner{grid-template-columns:1fr}\r\n  .wtp-hero-art{min-height:450px}\r\n  .wtp-about-inner{grid-template-columns:1fr}\r\n  .wtp-about-art{min-height:310px}\r\n  .wtp-benefit-grid{grid-template-columns:repeat(2,1fr)}\r\n}\r\n@media(max-width:640px){\r\n  .wtp-hero{min-height:0}\r\n  .wtp-hero-inner{padding-top:40px}\r\n  .wtp-hero-title{font-size:72px;-webkit-text-stroke:3px #111;text-shadow:6px 6px 0 #f01818,9px 9px 0 #111}\r\n  .wtp-hero-art{min-height:350px}\r\n  .wtp-burst{font-size:25px}\r\n  .wtp-cat-grid,.wtp-product-grid,.wtp-fav-grid{grid-template-columns:repeat(2,1fr)}\r\n  .wtp-cat-title{font-size:30px}\r\n  .wtp-cat-visual{min-height:235px}\r\n  .wtp-section-title{font-size:38px}\r\n  .wtp-section-head{align-items:flex-start}\r\n  .wtp-benefit-grid{grid-template-columns:1fr}\r\n  .wtp-about-copy h2{font-size:42px}\r\n}\r\n<\/style>\r\n\r\n<main class=\"wtp-home\">\r\n\r\n  <!-- HERO -->\r\n  <section class=\"wtp-hero\">\r\n    <div class=\"wtp-hero-inner\">\r\n      <div class=\"wtp-hero-copy\">\r\n        <span class=\"wtp-hero-kicker\">Welcome to the madness<\/span>\r\n        <h1 class=\"wtp-comic-title wtp-hero-title\">What The<br>Phuck?!<\/h1>\r\n        <div class=\"wtp-hero-tagline\">Weird desk toys. Rude little figures.<br><span>Absolute chaos.<\/span><\/div>\r\n        <p>Ridiculous ducks, strange figures and geek-inspired collectibles for desks, shelves and people with questionable taste.<\/p>\r\n        <div class=\"wtp-hero-buttons\">\r\n          <a class=\"wtp-btn wtp-btn-red\" href=\"\/shop\/\">Shop the madness<\/a>\r\n          <a class=\"wtp-btn wtp-btn-blue\" href=\"\/product-category\/new-drops\/\">New drops<\/a>\r\n        <\/div>\r\n      <\/div>\r\n\r\n      <div class=\"wtp-hero-art\">\r\n        <span class=\"wtp-burst blue\">Whack!<\/span>\r\n        <span class=\"wtp-burst red\">Honk!<\/span>\r\n        <img decoding=\"async\" class=\"main\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-muscle-duck.png\" alt=\"Muscle Duck\">\r\n        <img decoding=\"async\" class=\"goose\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-goose.png\" alt=\"Goose figure\">\r\n        <img decoding=\"async\" class=\"tank\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-tank-duck.png\" alt=\"Tank Duck\">\r\n        <img decoding=\"async\" class=\"cat\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-cat.png\" alt=\"Geek cat figure\">\r\n      <\/div>\r\n    <\/div>\r\n  <\/section>\r\n\r\n  <!-- CATEGORIES -->\r\n  <section class=\"wtp-categories\">\r\n    <div class=\"wtp-shell\">\r\n      <div class=\"wtp-cat-grid\">\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-cat\">\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-cat-visual\">\r\n            <h2 class=\"wtp-comic-title wtp-cat-title\">Phucking Ducks!<\/h2>\r\n            <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-muscle-duck.jpg\" alt=\"\">\r\n          <\/div>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-cat-body\"><p>Muscle ducks, tank ducks and absolute quackery.<\/p><a class=\"wtp-btn wtp-btn-yellow\" href=\"\/product-category\/crazy-ducks\/\">Shop ducks<\/a><\/div>\r\n        <\/article>\r\n\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-cat\">\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-cat-visual\">\r\n            <h2 class=\"wtp-comic-title wtp-cat-title\">Desk Chaos!<\/h2>\r\n            <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-frog-pen-holder.jpg\" alt=\"\">\r\n          <\/div>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-cat-body\"><p>Paperweights, ornaments and conversation starters.<\/p><a class=\"wtp-btn wtp-btn-blue\" href=\"\/product-category\/desk-ornaments\/\">Shop ornaments<\/a><\/div>\r\n        <\/article>\r\n\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-cat\">\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-cat-visual\">\r\n            <h2 class=\"wtp-comic-title wtp-cat-title\">Geeky Weirdos!<\/h2>\r\n            <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-tank-duck.jpg\" alt=\"\">\r\n          <\/div>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-cat-body\"><p>Cats, creatures and geeky collectibles.<\/p><a class=\"wtp-btn wtp-btn-red\" href=\"\/product-category\/geeky-weirdos\/\">Shop figures<\/a><\/div>\r\n        <\/article>\r\n\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-cat\">\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-cat-visual\">\r\n            <h2 class=\"wtp-comic-title wtp-cat-title\">Rude Gifts!<\/h2>\r\n            <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-goose.jpg\" alt=\"\">\r\n          <\/div>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-cat-body\"><p>Perfect for pranks, birthdays and questionable humour.<\/p><a class=\"wtp-btn wtp-btn-green\" href=\"\/product-category\/rude-gifts\/\">Shop rude<\/a><\/div>\r\n        <\/article>\r\n\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-cat\">\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-cat-visual\">\r\n            <h2 class=\"wtp-comic-title wtp-cat-title\">New Drops!<\/h2>\r\n            <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-strawberry-duck.jpg\" alt=\"\">\r\n          <\/div>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-cat-body\"><p>The latest and greatest phuckery.<\/p><a class=\"wtp-btn wtp-btn-pink\" href=\"\/product-category\/new-drops\/\">See what's new<\/a><\/div>\r\n        <\/article>\r\n      <\/div>\r\n    <\/div>\r\n  <\/section>\r\n\r\n  <!-- FRESHLY PHUCKED -->\r\n  <section class=\"wtp-section\">\r\n    <div class=\"wtp-shell\">\r\n      <div class=\"wtp-section-head\">\r\n        <h2 class=\"wtp-comic-title wtp-section-title\">Freshly Phucked!<\/h2>\r\n        <a class=\"wtp-view-all\" href=\"\/shop\/\">View all products<\/a>\r\n      <\/div>\r\n\r\n      <div class=\"wtp-product-grid\">\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-product-card\">\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-badge\">Best seller!<\/div>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-image\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-muscle-duck.jpg\" alt=\"Muscle Duck\"><\/div>\r\n          <h3 class=\"wtp-product-name\">Muscle Duck<\/h3>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-price\">\u00a314.99<\/div>\r\n          <a class=\"wtp-btn wtp-btn-yellow\" href=\"\/product\/muscle-duck\/\">Add to chaos<\/a>\r\n        <\/article>\r\n\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-product-card\">\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-badge\">Quack & destroy!<\/div>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-image\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-tank-duck.jpg\" alt=\"Tank Duck\"><\/div>\r\n          <h3 class=\"wtp-product-name\">Tank Duck<\/h3>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-price\">\u00a316.99<\/div>\r\n          <a class=\"wtp-btn wtp-btn-yellow\" href=\"\/product\/tank-duck\/\">Add to chaos<\/a>\r\n        <\/article>\r\n\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-product-card\">\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-badge\">WTF?!<\/div>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-image\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-cat.jpg\" alt=\"Lucky Cat Build\"><\/div>\r\n          <h3 class=\"wtp-product-name\">Lucky Cat Build<\/h3>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-price\">\u00a319.99<\/div>\r\n          <a class=\"wtp-btn wtp-btn-yellow\" href=\"\/shop\/\">Add to chaos<\/a>\r\n        <\/article>\r\n\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-product-card\">\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-badge\">Go duck yourself!<\/div>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-image\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-goose.jpg\" alt=\"Goose Figure\"><\/div>\r\n          <h3 class=\"wtp-product-name\">Goose Figure<\/h3>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-price\">\u00a312.99<\/div>\r\n          <a class=\"wtp-btn wtp-btn-yellow\" href=\"\/shop\/\">Add to chaos<\/a>\r\n        <\/article>\r\n\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-product-card\">\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-badge\">Sweet & rude!<\/div>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-image\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-strawberry-duck.jpg\" alt=\"Strawberry Duck\"><\/div>\r\n          <h3 class=\"wtp-product-name\">Strawberry Duck<\/h3>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-price\">\u00a313.99<\/div>\r\n          <a class=\"wtp-btn wtp-btn-yellow\" href=\"\/shop\/\">Add to chaos<\/a>\r\n        <\/article>\r\n\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-product-card\">\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-badge\">Armed & adorable!<\/div>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-image\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-soldier-duck.jpg\" alt=\"Soldier Duck\"><\/div>\r\n          <h3 class=\"wtp-product-name\">Soldier Duck<\/h3>\r\n          <div class=\"wtp-product-price\">\u00a315.99<\/div>\r\n          <a class=\"wtp-btn wtp-btn-yellow\" href=\"\/shop\/\">Add to chaos<\/a>\r\n        <\/article>\r\n      <\/div>\r\n    <\/div>\r\n  <\/section>\r\n\r\n  <!-- BENEFITS -->\r\n  <section class=\"wtp-benefits\">\r\n    <div class=\"wtp-shell\">\r\n      <div class=\"wtp-benefit-grid\">\r\n        <div class=\"wtp-benefit\"><div class=\"wtp-benefit-icon\">\ud83d\ude9a<\/div><div><strong>Free UK delivery<\/strong><span>On orders over \u00a350<\/span><\/div><\/div>\r\n        <div class=\"wtp-benefit\"><div class=\"wtp-benefit-icon\">\ud83d\udce6<\/div><div><strong>Discreet packaging<\/strong><span>No judgement here<\/span><\/div><\/div>\r\n        <div class=\"wtp-benefit\"><div class=\"wtp-benefit-icon\">\u21a9\ufe0f<\/div><div><strong>Easy returns<\/strong><span>14 day returns<\/span><\/div><\/div>\r\n        <div class=\"wtp-benefit\"><div class=\"wtp-benefit-icon\">\ud83d\udee1\ufe0f<\/div><div><strong>Secure checkout<\/strong><span>Shop with confidence<\/span><\/div><\/div>\r\n      <\/div>\r\n    <\/div>\r\n  <\/section>\r\n\r\n  <!-- ABOUT -->\r\n  <section class=\"wtp-about-band\">\r\n    <div class=\"wtp-shell wtp-about-inner\">\r\n      <div class=\"wtp-about-copy\">\r\n        <h2 class=\"wtp-comic-title\">What The Phuck<br><span>is this place?<\/span><\/h2>\r\n        <p>What The Phuck is an online store for weird and wonderful figures, rude desk ornaments, geek-inspired collectibles and gifts that make people laugh before they ask, \u201cWhere the hell did you buy that?\u201d<\/p>\r\n        <a class=\"wtp-btn wtp-btn-yellow\" href=\"\/about\/\">Read our story<\/a>\r\n      <\/div>\r\n      <div class=\"wtp-about-art\">\r\n        <img decoding=\"async\" class=\"cat\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-cat.png\" alt=\"\">\r\n        <img decoding=\"async\" class=\"muscle\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-muscle-duck.jpg\" alt=\"\">\r\n        <img decoding=\"async\" class=\"carrot\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-carrot-duck.jpg\" alt=\"\">\r\n        <img decoding=\"async\" class=\"tank\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-tank-duck.png\" alt=\"\">\r\n      <\/div>\r\n    <\/div>\r\n  <\/section>\r\n\r\n  <!-- CROWD FAVOURITES -->\r\n  <section class=\"wtp-favourites\">\r\n    <div class=\"wtp-shell\">\r\n      <div class=\"wtp-section-head\">\r\n        <h2 class=\"wtp-comic-title wtp-section-title\">Crowd Favourites!<\/h2>\r\n        <a class=\"wtp-view-all\" href=\"\/shop\/\">View all products<\/a>\r\n      <\/div>\r\n\r\n      <div class=\"wtp-fav-grid\">\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-fav\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-goose.jpg\" alt=\"\"><div class=\"wtp-stars\">\u2605\u2605\u2605\u2605\u2605<\/div><div class=\"wtp-rating\">(328)<\/div><\/article>\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-fav\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-muscle-duck.jpg\" alt=\"\"><div class=\"wtp-stars\">\u2605\u2605\u2605\u2605\u2605<\/div><div class=\"wtp-rating\">(516)<\/div><\/article>\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-fav\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-tank-duck.jpg\" alt=\"\"><div class=\"wtp-stars\">\u2605\u2605\u2605\u2605\u2605<\/div><div class=\"wtp-rating\">(412)<\/div><\/article>\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-fav\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-cat.jpg\" alt=\"\"><div class=\"wtp-stars\">\u2605\u2605\u2605\u2605\u2605<\/div><div class=\"wtp-rating\">(298)<\/div><\/article>\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-fav\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-soldier-duck.jpg\" alt=\"\"><div class=\"wtp-stars\">\u2605\u2605\u2605\u2605\u2605<\/div><div class=\"wtp-rating\">(271)<\/div><\/article>\r\n        <article class=\"wtp-fav\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/pub-c50872acc7ee4e98bf74d4cf37ba9403.r2.dev\/v1\/home-strawberry-duck.jpg\" alt=\"\"><div class=\"wtp-stars\">\u2605\u2605\u2605\u2605\u2605<\/div><div class=\"wtp-rating\">(355)<\/div><\/article>\r\n      <\/div>\r\n    <\/div>\r\n  <\/section>\r\n\r\n<\/main>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Welcome to the madness What ThePhuck?! Weird desk toys. Rude little figures.Absolute chaos. Ridiculous ducks, strange figures and geek-inspired collectibles for desks, shelves and people with questionable taste. Shop the madness New drops Whack! Honk! Phucking Ducks! Muscle ducks, tank ducks and absolute quackery. Shop ducks Desk Chaos! Paperweights, ornaments and conversation starters. Shop ornaments [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"elementor_header_footer","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-20","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/what-the-phuck.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/20","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/what-the-phuck.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/what-the-phuck.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/what-the-phuck.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/what-the-phuck.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=20"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/what-the-phuck.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/20\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":51,"href":"https:\/\/what-the-phuck.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/20\/revisions\/51"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/what-the-phuck.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=20"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}